A big part of my job is talking to people. As a language teacher and communication coach, I talk a lot every day for hours at a time. And a common topic is film and TV. My students/clients enjoy sharing their favorite movies and series with me, and it is an excellent way for them to hone their language skills.
Sometimes they will turn the tables and ask me what kinds of movies I like. I never know how to answer, except to say what I don’t watch, I don’t watch horror or sci-fi. I don’t like being scared.
At the risk of sounding pretentious, I don’t want to sound pretentious, but I like movies that make me think. I like complex characters that I can somehow relate to, or my shadow self can relate too. A good film will stay with me long after I watched it. So here are a few that I liked, that I still think about. They are all older films but worth the time to find.
Breaking the Waves 1996
This movie tells the story of a young Scottish woman who finds love, and then it all falls apart. The cinematography is stunning. Each chapter/section starts with a long still scene from nature that represents what’s to come. The story tells of the turbulence of love and sacrifice. It’s dark and lovely. It’s heartbreaking and complex. It’s strange. It’s Lars von Trier.
My Own Private Idaho 1991 / Drugstore Cowboy 1989
Oh, how I loved both of these films. I saw them when I was young, and I don’t think I understood the heaviness of the themes. But I did understand the characters and the way they moved through friendship, love, and self-preservation. Both films are by Gus Van Sant, who, do I even need to say it, is fantastic. Solid writing about the complexity of connection and amazing acting. I revisited both films as an adult and still enjoyed them. I finally understood things that I was too young to grasp the first time.
True Romance 1993/ Love and a .45 1994
I can trace my love of the idea of running away to Mexico from both of these films. Something I did when I was 26. They both are adventurous love stories with lots of action and a crazy set of characters. True Romance has a stoner Brad Pitt, and Love and a .45 has a voice box using Peter Fonda married to Ann Wedgeworth (you might remember her as sexy Lana from Three’s Company). At the end of both films, the main characters, Christian Slater and Patricia Arquette, and Renee Zellweger and Gil Bellows, run away to Mexico. And, one can only assume they live happily ever after. This idea so appealed to me, runaway someplace exotic and be, well, be happy.
We never see the reality of living in Mexico. I moved to Mexico in the summer of 2001 and moved back to the states in the summer of 2020. I didn’t get my happily ever after in Mexico, but I think I got something better.
Broken Flowers 2005
This film is about a man that revisits his ex-girlfriends from years past to find out who he was and who he has become. It’s a film that made me ask a lot of questions and analyze the same things in myself.
Can our past help us understand how we became who we are? Are we making the same relationship mistakes over and over? Are we learning about how to find a balance between selfishness and selflessness in a relationship? Is one better than the other? What would my ex-boyfriends say about me and who I am now?
I have zero answers, and I don’t think the main character finds the answers either, but it’s an interesting film, and well, Bill Murray. I love it when comedians can do dramatic roles. Like, Adam Sandler in Punch Drunk Love or Jim Carrey in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, another great film about love and relationships, breakups, and the eternal question; is it better to have loved and lost or never to have loved at all.
The Squid and the Whale 2005
The film is a story about divorce and our complex relationships with our parents. It explores family dynamics. The oldest son, played by Jesse Eisenberg, is at an age when he starts to understand that his parents are also people with dreams, disappointments, jealousy, and resentments. We can all relate to the time when we first understand that our parents are humans, real, imperfect people. The dad, played by Jeff Daniels, is a delicious character, a narcissist in every sense. It’s a great film well written with complex characters. Noah Baumbeck is the writer and director, he has several thoughtful films about relationships.
Darjeeling Limited 2007
The film is set in India, and the amazing Wes Anderson beautifully interprets the colors and countryside. The story follows three brothers, played by Owen Wilson, Adrien Brody, and Jason Shwartzman, on a train trip in India to reconnect after their father’s death. We learn about the brothers along the way. Their dynamic in the family, the familial roles they have always played, and how they have tried to leave them behind. It’s a beautiful film that portrays family dysfunction and how it shapes us. It is one of my favorite Wes Anderson films. The soundtrack is good too.
Geoge Harrison. Living in the Material World 2011
I included a documentary. I love documentaries. I watch a lot of them. Some are better than others. This one is so well put together and so inspiring I wanted to include it. It is long, like four hours long but great for a rainy Saturday afternoon while sipping hot tea. It focuses on the lesser-known Beatle, George Harrison, his life, his passions, and his character. He was an interesting, complex man. The film is directed by Martin Scorsese, which is probably why it is so long. He follows the life of this incredibly creative man who was a musical icon.
I grew up listening to the Beatles; my father is a huge Beatles fan. I know all the songs and have watched interviews and read oh so many articles, but this guy, while I was aware of him, I didn’t know anything about him. The film is a delight to watch. He was a creative and prolific musician, more than just the “quiet one,” as he was often referred to.
So that’s my list. I know its outdated, but all these films are worth the time to find them and watch them. I’d love to hear your thoughts on them. What old films have stuck with you?
